Let’s do laundry!

(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The simplest tasks often give us the most intense headaches. You know, the ones you do on auto pilot, because you have performed them so many times that you could do it with your eyes closed. When laundry is in question, don’t close your eyes. Unless you like your clothes to change color from washing to washing, that is. The fashionably disorganized people we are, we want just a bit of mess, and only occasionally, not a total, full-blown chaos.

When it comes to laundry you don’t really have to break the rules of common sense, or change the habits that your mother has wisely instilled in you. It is more the interpretation of them that will give the feel of chic messiness that we are aiming at.

For example: generally, clothes tags are misleading. Everything IS machine-washable. Only, some things are not WEARABLE after that.

Temperature selection is also mainly unnecessary. The only exception is wool, but even if you mess it up and run your favorite wool sweater through the scorch-and-spin cycle you will end up with a miniature felt item, which is nice for your kids’ soft toys.

Separating laundry by color usually means a lot of different containers, one for each shade, or at least darks/lights, and it also means memorizing which is for what – a lot of hassle over nothing. In most cases, luck allowing, nothing will happen if you wash them mixed. Go for it. And, if there ARE surprises, just take it as a welcome change to your wardrobe, without costs or waste of time for shopping.

Detergent: with the amount of choices we have, and the aggressive advertising, it almost feels like you are a real slob if you don’t use the detergents that the wide-smiled, white-clad people in the commercials are using. I have one rule: pick the one that smells best, because in a matter of few months a newer and better one will be launched. Which makes me think that the promise of removing all possible stains in the world they are making today, will be untrue when the newer, improved formula arrives.

Socks: no matter what you do, the Sock Monster will visit you and you will have odd socks – so give up on any system that you might be trying to implement, it is not really worth the trouble. Sock Monsters have needs and feelings too. (In case you have mastered the Sock Monster fight, please share the method, because the fight is driving me crazy).

Looking through the pockets before putting the laundry into the washing machine is tedious and usually you never find anything important. The important things, those that should not be washed at all, ever, WILL end up there, somehow, whether you like it or not. I, myself, have washed cell phones several times, with 50% success: half of the time they actually worked after the process. I must add that recent models are not as “machine washable” as the old, sturdy ones used to be.

Delicate items are not as delicate as they pretend to be. No need for separate treatment. Also, if you would really like a new silk dress, and are tired of the old one, it is the best strategy: destroy and then shop for new.

Those would be the basics. Let me know if I forgot to mention something.

How to teach your kids the (dis)organization skills

(Photo credit: theloushe)

When you are proud of something you do well and effortlessly, you would, of course, want your children to be equipped with the same skills. After all, it is easier that they learn from you, than the hard way – from their own mistakes.

Now, children are interesting creatures. When you tell them to do one thing, they will probably do the opposite. No matter what you say they will learn more from your example. When it comes to picking up disorganization skills from just copying you, it is possible to enforce this by preaching the exact opposite from the actual example that you are giving.

You probably already practice some of the below,  but here are the most successful techniques that will help you have disorganized offspring:

- If you need to use an object, never return it to where you took it from. When your child does the same, make sure to remind them every object has a home in your house.

- Do everything at the very last moment and without any preparation. Allow yourself to get carried away with the inevitable panicky feeling that you will not make it. At the same time remind your children of the importance of planning their chores and obligations as often as you can, but in as droning and as easy-to-ignore voice as you can render. This way, when they fail to do it and have only little time for the last-minute fix, preach on how bad it is not to plan.

- Procrastinate. This will force you to make shortcuts in your work, household chores and social obligations. Shortcuts are not always good and often mean something needs to be sacrificed. Give endless talks to your children on the importance of doing everything immediately and risks of not doing it. The longer and more tedious the talk – the better.

- When your children reply to you with: “But you do it too!” tell them off for replying back, being rude and explain that you are an adult. This confusing explanation will remain in their heads until they themselves are adults and understand that it is meaningless.

There are other small tricks, but those would be the “golden” fail-proof ones to ensure that your children continue the tradition of disorganized living. Their college roommates will thank you for it.

Have fun and let me know if it works!

Community: Then and Now

The idea for this blog came as a result of not being able to match my own expectations of having an organised life. Looking around Internet, I found a lot of really great advice that helps you keep the ever-growing mess of a family with children from going overboard, and I am thankful for that. However, the child in me, the one that I will never give up on, always claims her space; she needs to throw things on the floor and leave the dishes in the sink. Out of that conflict between trying to be tidy and wanting to be me is how this blog was born.

However, the more I write and get in touch with people through my posts, the more I realize that there is a sub-story to this whole thing, and that this story is not just mine, it is the story of this new, digital time.

Like many people nowadays, I live in  an urban area, very far away from my roots. I changed cities, countries and communities several times, leaving behind many good and bad memories and many valuable connections with people I met along the way. Some of those connections remain strong and solid, some are weakened  and others have broken. But if I take my glance off the big picture to direct it to its smallest parts, my daily life, and compare it to the daily life of an eight-year.old me, there is one significant difference: Community.

When I was growing up, in the seventies, your grocers knew your name and you could leave your groceries in the shop, without paying, while you went about running other errands. Now there are no small grocery stores in the area where I live. If there was rain, and you were not home, the neighbor would collect your laundry from the line, so it would not get wet. Now, if my laundry is missing I would think that somebody stole it. I don’t know my neighbors, and  many of them don’t even say “Hi” when we see each other in the corridors of my apartment block. I sometimes on purpose say “Hi” just to enjoy their momentary confusion. There are endless examples to this alienation of people.

But, times change. It is good to be nostalgic, but it is also important to understand that progress carries inevitable modifications to our lifestyles. We are alienated from the people who are physically closest to us and who share our everyday moments: our neighbors still live in the same building, and the big chain grocery store still employs people, it is just that we don’t form a community with them anymore.

(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The need to be a part of community does not disappear because the times and lifestyle have changed. It just finds new ways to realize itself. Blogging seems to be one of the ways, at least for me. If I see that people found my blog by searching content that I write about, if they read my blog, or comment on the posts, I feel that part of my everyday, some of my thoughts,  fears, laughs and worries are shared. In my immediate environment I might be just a customer in a shop, or a person that you pass by in the corridor, but through the blog I feel I belong to a community.

Of course, the way to interact with others online is completely different from what it used to be when our communities consisted of people who shared our every day lives, and I believe we are still learning. But I am glad that we do have a way to build new ways to answer the most human need, the need to be a part of a community.

Simple rules that will keep your work desk discreetly disorganised

Feeling comfortable at work is something that we all want, but oftentimes it is not the priority of our employers. You are assigned an office, or a desk, a chair, desktop computer and access to the basic facilities. Sometimes the space is nice, full of light, with rented office plants and ergonomic furniture, sometimes it isn’t. But whether cosy or not, it is a place where you spend most of your waking hours at. As such, it always reflects who you are and what you stand for, in the subtlest of ways.

Paper for my notebook. (Photo credit: rmkoske)

In order to have the needed doses of chaos in the workplace, and it is a necessity, unless you are superhuman or a robot, there are some simple activities that you can do to maintain the core disorganization of your desk. And worry not – it will be subtle and only obvious to you. Here it is:

- Keep all the papers neatly folded one on top of the other. This will give the impression of tidiness to others. They will never know that the papers are not sorted and that it is virtually impossible to find anything in that lovely neat pile.

- Have a desktop pencil station that keeps all of your ballpoint pens, pencils, erasers, stapler etc. in one place. Ballpoint pens often dry out fast, and if you have many, it will be a great accomplishment to find one that works when you need it.

- Post-it notes are a must – they are easy, and very useful – if you need reminders or quick notes, they are the best little tool there is. Have lots of them and keep them as long as you have desk space to post them onto. Also, in case you work with numbers a lot, write the number down without any other reference. Soon your desk will be invaded by numbers, but you will have no idea what they mean, although it will look like you are terribly busy all the time processing a lot of information.

- Nowadays you are probably working with a desktop computer or a laptop. This gives you the chance to unintentionally create an artistic installation made of impossibly entangled cables both on top of the desk as well as behind it. Art and chaos – perfection.

- If you are guilty of having your coffee and snacks at your desk, then it will be easy to add some color and texture to the seemingly tidy and busy work space: a couple of mugs, chocolate boxes and snack bags will easily add a splash of joy to the otherwise insipid grey/black/white/blue pattern that most offices have.

And with these few things you will have created the comfortable habitat characteristic of your disorganized self. Now back to work! Also, good luck finding your cell phone among all those post-it notes.

Guest are coming! a.k.a Let’s fake being tidy and organized

Even though you may be perfectly comfortable with your lifestyle of messiness, having guests over always gives you that strange pang of self-consciousness: what will they think about me when they see all this? In your internal monologue you argue with this pang and dismiss it saying that your home looks like it has been lived in by a happy family, not like a sterile magazine cover picture, but still, the peer pressure takes over and you start getting nervous, mobilizing the entire family to tidy up.

Sock Prayer Flags. (Photo credit: knitting iris)

Don’t worry. Half an hour of tidying up will not change anything, it will just clean out the visible, noticeable surfaces off most of the bits and pieces lying around, but your core disorganization is not in jeopardy. In fact  the fun of trying to locate things you have hurriedly placed in closets and drawers is waiting just round the corner, after the visitors have left.

The sequence of steps to a quick de-clutter is simple and easy: move stuff out of sight, quick dusting/vacuuming, dishes in the dishwasher, a wipe of the kitchen surfaces, a change of bathroom towels and voila! – you are ready to receive the guests. Make sure you assign tasks to the whole family, so that everybody runs around and asks you questions all the time. The hurry and irritation usually leave a nice glow on your face, so when the guest arrive, you will not be a hostess of a lovely home, but a good-looking hostess of a lovely home.

I usually ask the kids to tidy their room which ends up with removal of all clothes, toys and precious rubbish (children never throw anything and around 40% of the stuff in their room consists of things that should be thrown away), and relocating it to their closets, drawers and toy boxes. Sounds good, right? But, not all the items, in fact, very few, are actually stored in the place where they should belong. This way, after the guests leave, the toy box will have around 40% of toys, 40% of clothing, including odd socks (I believe in Sock monster) and 20% of rubbish (paper, packaging, and, some fossilized food).

After the quick sweep, go around with a vacuum cleaner and just do the open surfaces, the visible ones. What’s under the couch and behind the armchair is none of your guest’s business, and the dust and lost objects should live there uninterrupted. Yes, there is a risk that guests will drop something on the floor and it can roll under the couch, but there is no time now to do the deep cleaning.

Next step is kitchen, where you should put the dishes in the dishwasher. I am pretty sure that this action will also fill your garbage bin as well. Wipe the tops fast and try to find a presentable bowl in which you will serve the snacks. I know that this is a difficult task, so use your imagination – it is nice to serve your guests in an original way as well.

Last, but not least, pop by the bathroom, flush, change the towels to fresh ones and remove only the visible clutter.

The entire operation should not take more than half an hour, and the result is usually spectacular. Of course, if the kids are in a good mood. If they are not, you will probably be asked to be the judge of their bickering and fighting over who is not tidying or who is doing the ever imperceptibly smaller amount of work than the others, and other, similar, life-important issues.

At this point, the pangs of obsessive tidiness will return to nag you that this is not enough, and you will promise yourself to be more organised in future. But, you will most likely forget that, because if the guests are people you enjoy spending time with, it will not matter anyway. Just like in The 1000 Awesome Things blog, the dearest guests are those that we do not need to tidy for: http://1000awesomethings.com/2009/04/06/794-people-you-dont-clean-up-for-when-they-visit/.

Biggest travel bloopers – what’s yours?

Travel Guides (Photo credit: Vanessa (EY))

Travel is one of my favorite things to do. I am travelling to India in less than 10 days and preparations are ongoing. I will soon share some disorganisation tips on travel preparation, but today I would like to reflect on some past experiences.

When it comes to travel, the potential for making a chaos out of it is really big, and in the past I’ve had some really big bloopers.

My biggest travel disorganisation success was several years back when I was travelling to Oxford, England, to a conference. I had been invited to present a paper there many months before the actual event, so I had the chance to get a good airfare deal. I looked a bit around the net and found that I could travel from Finland via Oslo to Heathrow for a fairly low price, and then take a bus from London to Oxford. I sat down and booked the plane ticket. I’d to arrive in London in the afternoon before the first day of the conference. After that I would have enough time to take a bus and arrive to Oxford in the early evening. After the booking was done, I skimmed through the documentation I had received from the conference organisers and panicked. I seemed to have booked the flight to go on the very day of the conference, which was too late, as I was presenting my paper on the first day! I quickly went back and changed my booking to fly one day earlier. Some weeks after, the organisers offered the participants to have accommodation on campus and I reserved it. I was to check in the night before the conference after I arrive by bus from London. I must say I was very proud of the whole operation – everything was booked ahead of time and I only had to worry about my paper.

After many weeks of being buried in research, reading and writing, it was March, the time for me to travel. I printed my tickets and reservations, but did not really look at the printouts – at least once in my life I did everything on time, and in an “organized” manner. Or so I thought. On the plane from Oslo to London I wanted to give one last look at my paper and the conference schedule. I still remember the mixture of surprise, panic and anger at myself at that very moment. I even looked around the plane to check if anybody noticed how entirely silly and helpless I actually was. I realised that I am on my way to Oxford two days instead of one before the conference opening, and that I will arrive there in the evening and have no accommodation. A couple of cold sweats  and internal cuss monologues later I rewound the film and realised I had actually changed the initial (and correct) flight booking to an incorrect one. That is what you get when you leave important information scattered in million different papers and folders - a disorganisation technique carried out to perfection.

In short, my biggest travel blooper is changing a plane booking from a correct date to an incorrect one (and to this day I have no idea what kind of logic lead me to that), and realising it only while already on the plane, flying to an unknown town on a cold spring evening, with a big chance of sleeping in the park. I can tell you that I did manage to find accommodation that evening in Oxford. I found an Internet cafe and searched for local hostels, so I did not spend the night on a bench in the part. There is also a very good thing about this mistake of mine: I actually had one whole day before the conference to enjoy the beautiful Oxford in early spring . So, all in all, it turned out to be a nice adventure.

What is your biggest travel blooper? I’d love to hear your experience!

Let’s disorganize a party for the New Year’s Eve!

Drinks! (Photo credit: Martin Cathrae)

If you have found this post now, then congratulations, your disorganizing potential is huge, because deciding on a party on the very last day is the way to start.

Every chance to have your friends over is great, particularly around this time of year when it is cold outside – it is just perfect for gatherings. Plus, if you like to celebrate New Year, it is definitely a good idea to have a party. Inviting people over, making food, organising drinks and entertainment – all those activities give endless opportunity to sharpen your disorganisation skills.

An organised person would base her invitations on the size of the space they have. If your place is small, you should not invite all your work colleagues and their aunt because they would not fit. But, this systematic approach seems cruel and you will end up with only limited places, and a lot of deliberation time on who should be on the list and who you must drop from it. Luckily, the disorganised strategy saves you all that: just think of people you want to see at that party and invite them. Not all will be able to come anyway, and even in the unlikely case that everybody shows up, you will find a way to make everyone comfortable. Nobody remembers parties in which everything was perfect, best memories come from overcrowded, chaotic parties.

Now you know who you want to come, so it is time to see how the party will work. It’s important to have snacks and drinks, and to have enough of them, but before you run out to the store just block out all the other ideas that keep popping there: napkins and serving bowls for snacks (do you have any?), how will you dispose of the plastic cups and papers during the party (you’ll think about that tomorrow, hangover allowing), theme for the party and decoration (Xmas stuff is still around, it’s more than enough),  home-made or store-bought? (would be nice to show off your cooking skills, but not enough time now)… Just block all those out because they will lead you to a road of hard work, being late with every activity and greeting your guests tired and stressed out.

Do the shopping fast, just skimming the shelves and landing any appetizing packages into your cart. It will be enough, and, besides, no matter what amount of effort you put in offering your guests something exquisite, there will always be that mean person to dislike your party food, so you might as well take it easy. On the way home drop by the liquor store and buy several different types of drink. Fight the urge to remember fancy cocktail recipes. Just grab  the stuff you like and you know your closest friends like and leave it to people’s imagination to create the cocktails on the spot. Some of the world’s most famous hangovers come from those.

Pop in the shower, put on something nice (yes, this is difficult because of the “I have nothing to wear” thing, but just pick your favorite outfit), quickly put on some good music and start receiving your guests.

You will see that, if you truly embrace this method, without looking back and itemizing in your head all of the stuff you should have done but you didn’t, you will find that it is people who make the party, not the props. Enjoy!

A very happy New Year to all and I wish you good health, lots of smiles, love and good time in 2013!